This evening I decided (well this morning when I bought the stuff) to make a big ol' pot o' chili. When I got home, I thought I'd have a glass of wine, too. As I have a big bag o' wine in a box, it turned out that I had more than a glass. Well, more than even two glasses.
What does this mean? Well first of all, it means I made some truly spectacular chili. It also means that I am willing, under the influence of Bacchus, to share this particular recipe for the aforementioned chili.
For those of you who exist in a vacuum (and why does 'vacuum' have two 'u's?) or have not heard of the value of personal chili recipes, this is an extraordinary offer, indeed. It is on the order of the Patriot Act secrecy, it is on the order of the secrets of dark matter, black holes, and quantum mechanics. It is the holy grail, the gustatorial equivalent of the unification theory of everything!
Yet now I offer this to you; I offer a chili recipe that will excite the palate, will enrage the tongue, will cause the wailing of women, the gnashing of teeth, and full grown men to fall weeping to their knees; yea - the shaking of the very foundations of philosophy that binds our race together!
A bit much?
I think not.
Here we go:
First, you will need these things:
A can of black beans
A can of red kidney beans
A can of pinto beans
A can of Ro-tel - diced chilies and tomatoes - there are other manufacturers, too
A big can of tomato sauce
A big can of tomato puree
A pound or so of lean ground beef
A half pound or so of hot Italian sausage
A half cup or so of chili powder
A quarter cup or so of cayenne pepper powder
2 heaping tablespoons of chopped garlic
2 pretty big onions chopped fine if you like or not so much if you don't
Now, I have a big stainless steel pot, but you might not. It's a stew pot, so you might want to get one. Go ahead. I'll wait.
Good - now in this pot brown the sausage (remove the skin and break up) and the ground beef - sprinkle liberally with the chili pepper. Add some of the cayenne pepper. Add the garlic and onions.
If you must, drain some of the oil.
Add the tomato sauce, the tomato puree, all the cans of beans (after draining the goop they're packed in - it's evil, anyway). Also - add the Ro-Tel diced tomato and chile peppers.
Add the remainder of the chili powder and cayenne powder to taste. Add 2 or so cups of water. This is important because you're going to cook the water down once.
Now put all this stuff on a LOW light and cover - let it really cook. Stir every so often so it doesn't burn on the bottom of the pot. After an hour or so, move the top so it will cook down.
When it gets to the right consistancy, go ahead and make some rice. This will depend mostly on how many people are eating this stuff. I made 1 cup of basmati white rice, so that's good for me. You might want more. Once again, it's up to you.
Finally, put a few tablespoons of cooked rice on a plate, put some scoops of chili on top of that, and sprinkle with shredded cheddar cheese.
Mmmm. Eat it!
If you can't follow this recipe, it really helps if you've had several glasses of wine first.
Look, you really can't screw up chili. Well, maybe you can, but it takes more effort than to just make it.
That's that, and you know what?
I'll see you on the water!